7 good manners every girl should have

published on Saturday, 27 July 2013

Most girls know this is a manner that we need to have, but it still has to be said. Saying please when requesting something and thank you upon receiving anything, even if it is just an answer to a question, is crucial to having manners. 

Being from the South, manners have been genetically instilled in me since birth. Don't get me wrong, all Southerners do not have manners, but manners are still pretty much prized as being the ultimate quality to have, especially for a woman, around here. Certain manners can enhance your relationships, help you meet people, snag a new job you want, maintain a good professional demeanor, help you meet a man, make you more generous, keep you humble, and enhance your social skills. Read on to find my 7 favorites and do share yours with me, pretty please!

In the germophobic world we live in, no one seems to want to shake hands anymore, but offering your handshake is one of the most important manners every girl should have. I can't tell you the number of times I've met someone new and they seem a little hesitant towards me, or shy. I immediately offer my hand out to them and tell them how glad I am to meet them. This breaks down a barrier between you and strangers, and lets them know you're friendly. It also loosens you up and makes it easier to meet others each time you do it. If someone refuses to shake your hand, don't take it personally. They simply might have a germ issue, and in that case, just put down your hand and give them a smile. This manner is especially important on a job interview, where I always offer a handshake to the person interviewing me. It suggests confidence, which is priceless in the work field.

I don't care if someone is the same age as you or not, or even if they are younger. Anyone who is your employer, teacher, leader, mentor, co-worker, etc. should be called ma'am and sir out of respect. Trust me, they'll probably tell you that you don't have to call them that, but it still implies you are kind, respectful and courteous. Just say it and thank me later.

Most girls know this is a manner that we need to have, but it still has to be said. Saying please when requesting something and thank you upon receiving anything, even if it is just an answer to a question, is crucial to having manners. Do this with anyone, not just someone above you.

Unless you're on a date, it is a great idea to open doors for other people when out in public. Never open your date's door for him though, that's his job! Opening doors for other people signals that you're courteous, kind and aware of others. It is also one of the best hospitality gestures you can offer others. You don't have to be the bellhop and hold it open for everyone; one person will do!

One overlooked manner every girl should have is to smile. Smile at strangers, school mates, and co-workers whenever you get the chance. A simple smile and "Hey, how are you?" will get you further along in developing relationships, meeting people, maintaining a good work relationship, and generally make you seem happier and easier to talk to. Plus, a smile is the prettiest thing you could ever wear!

This might sound old fashioned, but it's true! When you're out in public at an event or on a date, cross your legs, or at least your ankles. Don't slouch in your chair with your legs hanging out in front of you, but instead, sit up straight and maintain a good ladylike position. You don't need to look stiff like you're at a tea party, but simply sit up tall with good posture and gently crossed legs or ankles. This manner will help you seem professional, feminine, graceful and classy.

For the love of being a lady, stop cursing! Unless you're at home alone and just broke that glass dish your mom gave you for Christmas, of course! Then it's okay since you're alone! Seriously though, don't make a habit of cursing, especially around guys. They want to date someone who is a lady, not a potty mouth. Cursing is also a big no no on the job. Employers don't want their employees having bad language or it might influence their company's image. Having good manners doesn't just equate to wiping your mouth at the dinner table, though that is a great manner to practice. These simple, yet effective manners are actions every girl can and should take, to maintain a ladylike, professional and classy appearance. After all, we are girls so let's act like one! What is an important manner you were taught to have?


Wow!: DJ Khaled proposes to Nicki Minaj with a $500,000 diamond ring

published on Friday, 26 July 2013

People on my twitter timeline have been going on about this issue since yesterday. I vowed not to blog about it because I feel it's a publicity stunt, but the craze the issue is raising amazes me.

The 37 year old record producer, rapper, DJ and record label executive, Khaled bin Abdul Khaled, popularly known as DJ Khaled proposed to Nicki Minaj via a video posted online. He said; "I want to be honest with you. I love you. I like you. I want you to be mine. The only reason I'm not telling you this face to face is because I know that you're busy. You need a man like me in your life that's gonna take care of you and respect you. You gotta take your time and think about it, I understand... but I know I have to be here today to let you know how serious I am and about how serious this is to me. I want to let your fans know, my fans know, my family, your family, that I wanna marry you. I been working hard to get this ring... Nicki Minaj... will you marry me?"

The ring on the other hand is huge. No wonder he said "I been working hard to get this ring"! Lmao! I hear it is a $500,000 diamond ring. The proposal was put together with help from MTV.

I know Nicki would have seen it but hasn't responded yet.

Watch the proposal here;

Basketmouth- "Before I Write A Book"

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Y'all know anything from ace comedian; Basketmouth is definitely going to crack your ribs! I heard he is going to share short stories about his experience with people while growing in the Nigerian entertainment industry in a series called 'Before I Write a Book.' He apparently plans to write a book eventually. The series are pre-entries to the book, thus, the title.

He has therefore released the first story in the series. Read it below;

"Back stage at the Rothmans Groove tour which held @ TBS in 1998, there I was seated with the likes of The Plantashun Boiz,Dr. Fresh,Remedies and more...I was just a young boy trying to weigh his options on what direction to go with his career as drumming,rapping,producing and comedy were few of my options.
That night was the 1st time I met Tony Tetuila, one of those humble guys you come by,he was warm and accommodating considering the obvious fact that I was nobody in the industry.
Fast forward a few months later, Comedy had won me over and in the course of my hustle and journey to where I'm yet to get to, I bumped into Tetuila  in Festac, just about the time his single 'you don hit my car' came out.

We reconnected while playing catch up. We had common friends so 'bumping' into each other became a tradition. The 1st time he saw me perform @ a concert was at a gig The Plantashun Boiz used to host @ the Den in Ikeja.

I must have impressed him because not long after that night, I got a call from him asking that we meet up. We did and he took me for a meeting in Lagos Island (Shell Office). A director at Shell was retiring and a send-forth party was being held in his honour. My performance fee then was N10,000, Tony pushed it up and convinced the client to pay N30,000 which they paid cash. Prior to this, they had never heard of me and only used me because Tony believed in me and stood up for me, convincing them to buy in.

I was paid in full a week to the show.

After picking up the cash I went straight home. Now here I was,  a young comic with his 1st major pay-out of N30,000. Considering the fact that my 1st performance fee was N300 (1%) of what I had in my pocket,I couldn't help but to thank God.

I got home,gave my mum N25,000 and kept N5,000 from which I bought a shirt,pants and shoes from Tejuosho market to wear for the event. Ready for my first big show."

Pictures: Mercy Johnson goes to school! Lmao!

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That is the voluptuous Mercy Johnson looking like a little school girl! Lmao! Mercy Johnson is currently on the set for the brand new Tchidi Chikere comedy, 'Dumebi Goes To School' which is a sequel to the hilarious "Dumebi The Dirty Girl'.

Alade Odunewu..Veteran Journalist Dies At 85

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Veteran journalist Alhaji Alade Idowu Odunewu is dead
The late Odunewu, who wrote with the pen name Allah De, was former Editor of the Daily Times ,died yesterday at St Nicholas Hospital, Lagos. He was 85.
His Allah De column was for many years the delight of readers for its wit, simplicity and humour. His remains will be buried today at the prestigious Vaults and Garden, Ikoyi, Lagos at 3pm. He is survived by three children.
It was widely acknowledged by his contemporaries that few loved journalism like Allah De. He was one of those rare specimens born for a time and a profession.
According to Felix Adenaike, a former editor of the Tribune, "Alade Odunewu was a great craftsman who lived journalism".
Former Managing Director of The Guardian Mr. Lade Bonuola said: "Oga was a titan, even in the fast depleting generation of the masters. The other day it was Unuegbu. He was an exceedingly gifted writer who always had very close by his armoury of humour, ranking with Baker of New York Times and Cameron of Daily Express in humour and Bernard Levin of The Times of London in seriousness and mastery of language.
"Of course, Cassandra of the Daily Mirror of whom he was a proud disciple. A product of Regent Polytechnic, he was one of the early elite that ruled our great Kingdom that the Daily Times was. He was the best all-round final student at Regent. He was a moral compass who yield, space to none in integrity.
"With the departure of his wife last year, he lost his accustomed ebullient will to live. He was kept going by his wonderful children – Ebun, Akanni and Segun. When a person like that departs, it is as if a part of you is gone. So is a part of Nigeria's history."
The late Odunewu was also acknowledged as one of the founding fathers of Nigerian journalism who continued to support the industry many years after his retirement from active practice of the profession. He was the chairman of the Nigeria Press Council (NPC) and Chairman, Board of Trustees (BoT) of the Nigeria Media Merit Award (NMMA).
Allah De began his journalism career at the Daily Times as a reporter after his secondary education at the New Bethel College, Onitsha, Anambra State but fate seemed to have a higher calling for him as he secured a Federal Government scholarship to study Journalism at the Regent Street Polytechnic London- now University of Westminster.
He was a star in London, winning the Commonwealth New Statesman Prize for the best all-round student and also working for a number of British newspapers- a rare feat at the time and even now- before returning home.
Between 1950-56, the late Odunewu worked at the Daily Times as a reporter and sub-editor. He left to become the Managing Editor of the African Press Limited Ibadan, publishers of the Nigerian Tribune. That was 1956 and 1957. Odunewu spent four years, between 1960 and 1964, as the Editor-in-Chief of the Allied Newspapers of Nigeria before he left to become the Editor, Sunday Times, in 1964.
He rose through the ranks at the Daily Times before he was appointed editor of the paper, coming after Peter Enahoro who was initially known as "George Sharp" and later as Peter Pan. The late Odunewu's time as the editor of the most prestigious newspaper at the time has been described with many charitable adjectives by those who worked with him. While Peter Pan was a "great writer", Odunewu was adjured to have combined his fine writing skill with even a greater talent as an editor of the paper.
Perhaps one of the lasting legacies of the departed journalist is his " Allah De" column, which has been described by many as one of the best satires ever penned by a Nigerian journalist. The late Nnamdi Azikwe-himself a fine writer- described the late Odunewu as the dean of Nigerian satirical writing.
"Satire is the stuff of his work, master of the well-placed innuendo. Odunewu called attention to the follies and foibles of his era without wounding the vanities of the men and women of the moment," Journalism teacher and The Nation Editorial Adviser Olatunji Dare once wrote in 2007.
Encomiums were pouring in last night from his contemporaries and those who knew him only through his writings. Henry Odukomaiya, who took over from him as the Editor of the Daily Times said: " I am shocked, saddened to learn from you about the sudden departure of my great boss, Alade Odunewu whose pseudonym was Allah De which was the name of the column he gave birth to when he was Editor-in-chief of the Daily Times."
Odukomaiya had a flattery reminiscence of the character of the writer. "The Allah De that I knew was one of the most accommodating bosses that anybody could have, I mean every word of what I am saying. He never offended anybody, he did his job to the best of his ability and his ability was quite high. He was very jocular and that reflected in every of his writing. He was elegant too. He didn't take life too seriously. Unfortunately, he didn't have a good matrimonial life.
Adenaike remembered the late Odunewu as a great mentor to the younger generation of journalists and a great craftsman. "That was the father of journalism. Nigerian journalism has lost one of its founding fathers, and he was a great mentor to the younger ones. He wrote a column Allah De. He was a great humorist and satirist. He was a great craftsman. He lived journalism; he published two books – Winner takes all which was the compilation of his columns into two volumes."
Sam Amuka Pemu, publisher of The Vanguard said of the late Allah De: "He was a fine fellow; we will miss him." Mr. Femi Kusa former Editor of the Guardian, described him as a great columnist who was very careful and diplomatic in his writings.
There were others too who paid glowing tributes to a man who gave his life for journalism. The chairman, Nigerian Union of Journalists (NUJ) Lagos State Council, Deji Elumoye, said the late Odunewu was a foremost journalist who never did anything else but journalism. "He talked about proper practices of journalism and was always willing to advise the NUJ. We will miss him," he said.
Former Editor of The Sunday Times Gbolabo Ogunsanwo believed the profession has lost one of its heroes. "Alade Odunewu was the uncrowned dean of newspaper columnists."
Perhaps, few can be said to have matched the passion and the talents of the late Odunewu, his devotion to the cause of the journalism profession would be a model that the profession may find hard to fill. And as he is committed to mother earth today, the encomiums may have just begun.


The Senate denies endorsing underage marriage law!

published on Wednesday, 24 July 2013

Senators Atiku Bagudu and Akin Odunsi yesterday denied that the upper legislative house had endorsed child marriage, insisting that what they voted for was the process of renouncing Nigerian citizenship.

But another senator, representing Ondo Central Senatorial district, Ayo Akinyelure yesterday wept publicly over his role in voting in favour of child marriage just as he explained that he voted in error.

Reacting to the controversy generated by the voting on some of the proposals contained in the draft amendment bill of the 1999 Constitution last week, the senators said that the matter had been blown out of proportion. "What the Senate voted for was not child marriage but renunciation of Nigerian citizenship," they said.

Answering questions from newsmen at the National Assembly, Bagudu, who is the Chairman of the Senate Committee on Interior regretted that the ongoing debate were devoid of the facts.

According to him, by the reaction of Nigerians, the Senate has been wrongly drawn into a debate that the lawmakers were not allowed to express their opinion on. He said: "The essential element of the voting was on Section 29, clause 4(b), which deals with the renunciation of Nigerian citizenship.

There was an attempt to remove the element, which allows marriageable women to have the right to decide to renounce their citizenship and define the age of marriageable women as those who have attained the age of 18 years."

He stated that marriage in Nigeria is regulated by the Marriage Act, Matrimonial Act, communal laws etc, and that none of these statutes contains any definitive age for marriage. The lawmaker stressed that at no time did the Senate try to lower the age threshold of people wishing to marry.

He observed that in most countries of the world, marriage below the age of 18 years is allowed but with parental consent. Senator Odunsi, in his own reaction, also expressed disappointment that the debate was uncalled for since it was never the issue the Senate voted for.

"What the Senate voted for was on citizenship," he said. According to him, the said section 29, clause 4, which is generating the outrage merely defines the persons that can renounce their citizenship and that was where the issue of women and marriage was mentioned.

He said the section states that any woman that is married in Nigeria is of full age. "Section 29 of the 1999 Constitution is still the extant or existing law and what the Senate attempted to do that day was to expunge that clause but could not do so due to the shortage of 13 votes because 60 senators voted for its removal as against the constitutionally required 73 votes, while 35 voted for its retention," Odunsi said.

According to the lawmaker, from what happened last Tuesday, the Senate merely attempted to expunge the somewhat archaic clause and not in any way created the law as now wrongly portrayed by Nigerians.

But, Senator Akinyelure, while speaking to his community leaders and the people of his constituency in Akure, the Ondo State capital, yesterday said there was a misinterpretation of voting on his part. The senator, who was the only lawmaker from the South-West that voted in favour of the child marriage, was summoned by the people and the leaders of the Labour Party, LP, in the state over his role in the matter.

He burst into tears when he realised how angry the people were about his action. Prior to the commencement of the meeting, youths, who were aggrieved by the position of the senator barricaded the venue of the meeting, displaying placards with various inscriptions and clashed with the senator's supporters, who also mobilised to the venue. It took the timely intervention of policemen to save the situation from degenerating into a free-for-all as the belligerents hauled stones at each other.

The senator however explained that what the Senate considered was the provision of the Constitution for renunciation of citizenship contained in section 29 (4b) which provides that any woman who is married shall be deemed to be of full age.

He, however, said what he voted in favour was whether a married woman is deemed to be of full age to renounce her Nigerian citizenship and not whether a woman can marry before attaining the age of 18 years. Akinyelure said he cannot vote in support of the child marriage, saying "I cannot vote in support of child marriage, I cannot support an underage to go and marry; it is against our culture and customs.

"My voting NO was in error of misrepresentation and I had no opportunity to correct what is deemed to be my error now, because voting was done electronically. "If voting were to be done by show of hands, I would have been able to correct my error before the voting was concluded by the Senate," he said.

He, however, apologised to the leaders of the party in the state and the people of his constituency for the error, saying he regretted his action. Women leaders across the six council areas representing the Ondo Central Senatorial District disowned the lawmaker and asked him to renounce his position.

The women leaders, including Mrs. Ade Ajiboye from Akure North, Mrs. Iyabo Ojo from Ifedore, Fadoju Bunmi of Ondo East, Bimbo Bakare from Ondo West, Kikelomo Adeniyi from Idanre unanimously described the amendment on child marriage as inhuman. "We say no to child marriage, it is worst than child abuse.

We wonder why he would support the action. Can 10-year-old girl face the challenges of marriage," the women leaders said.

In a related development, the wife of the former Chief Justice of Nigeria, CJN, who is also the Chairperson of a Kanobased non-governmental organisation, Isa Wali Empowerment Initiative, Mrs. Maryam Uwais, has criticised the report credited to the former Governor of Zamfara State, Senator Ahmed Yerima that Sharia supports giving out underage girls in marriage.

Uwais, who made his position known via an online resource, Sahara Reporters, insisted that there is nothing under the Islamic law that stipulates or recognises child marriage or that says that any girl that is married shall be deemed an adult.

Uwais said: "Once again, Senator Yerima is in the news, claiming Islam as the basis for his argument that a girl automatically transforms into an adult of 'full age' once she is married, with the attendant responsibilities that relate to the renunciation of citizenship, irrespective of her age or mental capacity.

Because the Senator from Zamfara State has gone public with his personal comprehension of the Shari'a, it has become necessary to respond publicly to his utterances.

"It should be pointed out, however, that several media reports on the constitutional review debate at the Senate give the impression that underage marriage has been endorsed by the Senate Chambers. Facts are that S.29 of the 1979 Constitution permits a Nigerian citizen of 'full age' to renounce his or her citizenship by declaration in a prescribed manner, for which purpose 'full age' was stated to be 18 years and above.

The subsection also provides that, 'any woman who is married shall be deemed to be of full age'. In its current efforts to review the Constitution, the Senate Committee had determined that the particular subsection should be deleted, basically because citizenship has no bearing on gender, as for example, voting, the right to drive a car, possess a weapon or such similar social interactions that are evolving or are germane to a democratic nation.

"Senator Yerima, however, vehemently argued (and lobbied) against the removal of the clause, on the grounds that deleting that clause was against (his understanding of) Islam. In his understanding, a girl, once married, automatically assumes the full mental capacity and responsibility to consciously make the prescribed declaration of renouncing her citizenship.

"This position needs to scrutinise carefully, against the backdrop of similar positions that obtain under the Shari'a and in our context, as a nation?

"Contrary to the position conveyed by the Senator from Zamfara, there is certainly no unanimity of positions on such contemporary matters of social interaction, within Islamic jurists or the various Schools of Thought.

"Surely where there is 'silence in the texts' (i.e primary sources) or lack of unanimity as regards a particular practice, that opening allows for a society to determine for itself what is in its best interest (maslaha), in its own context." Meanwhile, Nigerian students have condemned the move to legalise underage marriage, describing it as a step to debase womanhood.

The students, under the aegis of the National Association of Nigerian Students, NANS, who urged the Senate to reverse the move, also sought the prosecution of Yerima at the International Court of Justice, ICJ, Hague, for alleged child abuse, having married a 13-year-old Egyptian girl. In a statement in Ado Ekiti, the Ekiti State capital, yesterday, NANS Chairman, Ekiti Axis, Comrade OluwadamilareBewaji, described as sad and unprogressive, the annulment of constitutionally recognised age for adulthood by the Senate.

The students said the step by the Senate had brought serious ignominy to the nation in the eyes of the international community, adding that the action must be challenged by all rightthinking Nigerians. The students called for the immediate reversal of the action, saying: "We hereby pass a vote of no confidence in the upper chamber of the National Assembly over this un-progressive action and dishonour they had brought to our culture.

"How can the Senate of the most populous nation in Africa debated and passed such action? We want to say that children under age 18 and below must be constitutionally protected and accommodated in our constitution. "We also believe that Senator Ahmed Yerima must be tried at ICJ. We believe the distinguished senator must be tried for child abuse having taken a 13-year old Egyptian as a wife", they said.

JK meets Jaywon: "I am getting married this year"

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When you hear Jaywon, what do you think? I think Facebook love, This Year, Catch me if you can, Godsent and lots of other hit tracks! JK sat down with the homely star known as Oluwajuwonlo James Iledare and he spoke about growing up with his mum, meeting Kennis Music, surprisingly getting married this year and lots more!

JK. In a brief sentence, Who is Jaywon?

Jaywon: I am Oluwajuwonlo James Iledare. I'm me and I love to be me always. I hate fake things.

JK. Where did the stage name "Jaywon" come from?

Jaywon: I got it from my real name 'juwon'. Remove the 'u' from juwon, what we av left is "j won" thus; jaywon.

JK. What was growing up like?

Jaywon: growing up was very very interesting and would always be to any child with a mum like mine who is always there to give you everything you need.

JK. Why music?

Jaywon: Music chose me because I was just playing around as a child not even knowing I could sing but people would hear me and ask me to sing for them and that was how it all started.

JK. How did you meet up with Kennis music?

Jaywon: I met them while performing at kennis music easter fiesta in 2009 and after then they offered me a deal which I thought wasn't bad and just like they say, the rest is history.

JK. Facebook love with Essence, the first song that sealed your deal with me, what inspired it?

Jaywon; (Laughs) I did facebook love while freestyling in the studio and at that point essence was working on her album so she put a verse on it and we decide to put it on her album but originally the song was mine.

JK. Did you expect the track, "this year" to be as huge as it turned out to be?

Jaywon: This year, the song, is just a blessing because I wasn't doing a hit song wen I was in the studio, only went there to do a song to encourage my fans for the new year but All Glory To God on the song.

JK. The remix of catch me if you can with Ice Prince and Phenom, why them? Why a remix? What was the inspiration behind the song itself and the video?

Jaywon: ice is a cool dude and phenom is anoda humble homie that I respect, so I put them on it but the song is another song for those who hate wit no reason ' you dont need to tell me I am not your best because the last time I checked gan your best still dey lift my old lyrics (laughs)

JK. The track "Godsent" with Tiwa Savage, how did that come about? Cause I personally love the song

Jaywon: God sent is another inspirational song for everybody because we all pray to God to send us one and does not have to be your girl friend or boy friend, could be anybody.

JK. How exactly did the death of Goldie affect you?

Jaywon: Goldie wasn't just a label mate to me, she was a good friend and one of the things I learnt is to do more evergreen songs and more good things to be rememberd For because nobody knows what can happen.

JK. What are the measures you take to remain relevant in the industry?

Jaywon: To do more spiritual and sensible music. Not like the everyday music. I am Different and I can never be like them. I am different from them!

JK. Concerning love, I hear Jaywon has a girlfriend. How true is that? Tell us more about her?

Jaywon: hmmmm, of course I do, I've never talked about this anywhere because she's one part of me people don't know.

JK. Are there any plans of marriage in the nearest future?

Jaywon: anything can happen! getting married this year! (Laughs).

JK. What does the future hold for Jaywon?

Jaywon: We don tey for the game men but na we still be the future. Ipada abija toh bloodi. New Team Coming Soon!!

JK. Word of advice to young upcoming artistes

Jaywon: stay focused and dont let anybody tell you Nonsense like Eja nla said. You are the best in your own way. Believe in yourself and pray hard. The street is millitary and its only you that can protect your future, nobody can do it for you. Keep your head up. God bless us all!!! Big thanks to everybody reading. Odun yii Noni. 2020 Odun yii Noni!!!


Actress Amanda Bynes placed under psychiatric care in California

published on Tuesday, 23 July 2013

Troubled actress Amanda Bynes has been taken to a hospital for involuntary psychiatric care after the former teen star was involved in a disturbance in Southern California, authorities said on Tuesday.

Don Aguilar, a spokesman for the Ventura County Sheriff's Department, declined to describe the incident that prompted deputies to take Bynes into custody and commit her for psychiatric evaluation.

But local media reported that the 27-year-old actress had started a fire in the driveway of a home in the Los Angeles suburb of Thousand Oaks. Bynes was born in Thousand Oaks and grew up there.

The Ventura County Fire Department confirmed that it responded on Monday night to an incident involving a gas can that was set on fire in a driveway and that Bynes was at the scene, but it would not say if she was accused of starting the fire.

The small fire, which scorched the driveway, was extinguished by local residents, the fire department said.

Under California law a person may be detained for a mental health evaluation for up to 72 hours.

A message left with Bynes' attorney was not immediately returned.

The actress rose to prominence at age 13 when she had her own comedy show on the Nickelodeon television network but has made headlines over the past year for erratic behavior, legal problems and odd posts on Twitter.

Bynes, who is on probation in California for driving on a suspended license, is on trial in the state on a charge of driving under the influence and in New York on charges of marijuana possession and throwing a bong out of a window.


First pictures of the royal baby!

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Congrats to the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge once again!

Read updates here;

Underage Marriage And The Leadership Question

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I have never been more grieved about the condition of the Nigerian state. Why do our leaders continue to make us a laughingstock before the world? We were just recovering from the Governors' Forum fracas when we were again jolted by the show of shame in Rivers State House of Assembly. Now, the bug has moved to the National Assembly – and the legislators have done the unthinkable – a fraction of them has voted for underage marriage!

Underage marriage is just another euphemism for child abuse. Actually, it is tantamount to paedophilia. Merely contemplating the idea would have been utterly loathsome. It is therefore totally inconceivable that some sectarian demagogues in Abuja would actually attempt to give it legal backing. Apparently, these folks have been active proponents of this ignoble practice all along and were only seeking the slightest avenue to announce their shamelessness under the cloak of legislative duties.
Recently, while discussing my views on the gay rights debate on the Signorile Show – a radio programme that airs across the United States and Canada on Sirius XM Radio and globally online – I drew an analogy between homosexuality and paedophilia. It is unfortunate that the same lawmakers who condemned gay marriage now support paedophilia in a pitiable display of emotional entrapment that can very well pass for conflict of interest. While a sane legislature should be making provisions to fully execute the Child Rights Acts which stipulates 18 years as the minimum age of marriage for girls, some of our senators are seeking new ways to relieve their libido and assuage their concupiscence.
Let's take note of these members of the Senate who are compromising the well-being of our girls. We cannot continue to commit our national destiny to this kind of people. They are misrepresenting us as Nigerians and trampling our national values!  We must exercise our right to vote with greater discretion in subsequent elections. Meanwhile, let's all lend our voices to the campaign against child marriage. A good place to start is sharing this article and similar ones across your social media platforms. You should also consider joining the conversation on Twitter with the hashtag #ChildNotBride.
Together, we will deliver the future!

-Philip Amiola (@PhilipAmiola).
-Information Nigeria

NYSC To Start Posting Corpers To Other Establishments

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I'm so excited, you can't imagine! Here's what I read on CKN NIGERIA;

"In order to ensure that corps members obtain work experience relevant to their academic qualifications, the management of the National Youth Service Corps (NYSC) would from the next batch of positing rescind its decision to send corps members to serve in schools only.
Graduates of medicine would therefore be posted to hospitals and health centers, law graduates would be posted to Ministries of Justice, law chambers and Legal-based NGOs, just like others would be posted to organisations where their academic qualifications would be deployed to use. Graduates of Education and single honours would be deployed to schools under the new policy.
The policy was adopted  last year after the realisation that most organisations, especially in the private sector,  take advantage of the scheme to keep their wage bill low as they  do not make any effort to retain any corps members who served with them; rather they would throw them into the labour market and demand for fresh corps members .
The Chairman of the Board of the NYSC, Chief Gordon Bozimo, made this disclosure in an exclusive interview noted that the NYSC would not allow private sector organisations to take advantage of its CMs anymore.
This, he added, would be done through the demand and signing of an Memorandum of Understanding (MoU) with any private sector organisation that demands for corps members to retain a certain percentage of the corps members at the end of the service year.
"If an organisation writes us to send corps members to them, it means they have need for manpower; these are graduates, they are educated, they are not clerks, so if we are send  50 corps members , the organisation would sign an MoU to retain at least, let's say 30 percent. That will also make the corps members know they have something at stake, they have to show good example and work hard," he said.
This arrangement, he clarified does not, however, mean that such CMs at the end of their service year would not undergo the aptitude tests of the organisations if they have those as requirement for full employment.
Bozimo added that it is counter-productive to send a doctor to teach in a school as a year of teaching cannot be considered as relatable work experience for such doctor.
"In some schools, you get more corps members than full time teachers, so we are hoping that by the next batch, we would send corps members  to where their expertise would be appropriate," he added.

The Board Chairman disclosed that the NYSC is working with state governments to improve the living conditions in the camps that need improvements especially in terms of security, power and water supply to the camps."

Pictures: Lady gaga goes nude for V magazine!

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#ChildNotBride: I Have Never Given Out My Daughters In Marriage Before University Graduation- Atiku

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These senators shouldn't have religion into this. At least Atiku is muslim. Here's what he said;

"As a father, I've never given out my daughters in marriage before university graduation. It's a personal decision. I had earlier stated my personal choices on the child marriage issue; I have always supported our women and children. For the avoidance of doubt, I do not support any constitutional provision which creates ambiguities about the age of consent for marriage. It's therefore very inspiring to see young Nigerians active and organized on ChildNotBride . I'm proud to see an engaged generation at work."

Report: Patience Jonathan’s mother dies in a car crash

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News reports from Port Harcourt said Mrs. Iwari-Oba, the mother of the wife of Nigeria's President Goodluck Jonathan, Patience, may have died in an auto-accident on Monday.

The mother of Mrs. Jonathan was said to have been involved in a ghastly motor accident along Elele Road in Rivers State.

The Punch reported that the woman, who is from Okrika Local Government Area, was on her way to Bayelsa State when the accident happened and that her corpse has been deposited in the mortuary. The report did not indicate the age of the woman.

The report mentioned Mr. Evans Bipi, a relative of Mrs Jonathan, as one of the people who deposited the corpse at the mortuary, with an aide to Bipi confirming that the woman died about 4p.m yesterday.

Bipi's aide, Mr. Fred Itobo, told The PUNCH that the President's wife's mother was involved in the accident while she was on her way to Bayelsa State.

"Yes! She was involved in an accident and she died. Her body has been taken to a mortuary. Bipi was among those who took her body to the mortuary," Itobo said.


Photo of the day: Royal baby craze!

published on Monday, 22 July 2013

Lmao! With the royal baby craze going round, Lauren on my TL decided to create this! Smh!

Kate and William are now proud parents!

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Kate Middleton has finally given birth!


The duchess of cambridge gave birth to a baby boy at 4:24pm. The baby is 8pounds 6 ounces.

Congratulations to the royal family!

MBGN 2013: Miss Bayelsa, Anna Ebiere Banner!

published on Sunday, 21 July 2013

A New MBGN Queen has emerged. She is no other than 18 year old Anna Ebiere Banner. She represented Bayelsa state and beat 31 other contestants to emerge the 2013 Most Beautiful Girl in Nigeria. The 26th edition of the pageantry took place in Yenagoa, Bayelsa. Anna will go against other beauty queens from around the world at the Miss World 2013 Finale in Jakarta, Indonesia.

The 1st runner-up 19 year old Stephanie Okwu representing Imo state, will represent Nigeria in the Miss Universe 2013  competition in Moscow, Russia while 20 year old Powede Lawrence representing Adamawa state, will represent Nigeria in the Miss Tourism 2013 competition.

Congrats Anna!

Photo of the day: Women never seize to amaze me!

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I Slept With My Mum, Pounded 27 Babies, Ate 100 Tongues! Read Shina Rambo's Unbelievable Confessions

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It was a beautiful Saturday morning, I was garbed in a pair of jeans, on a pair of Timberland boots, a military sweat shirt, and my JackMoody denim jacket. I had been attacked by men of the underworld the night before whilst we were on production, at the office. So I slung my black Ted Baker satchel across my right shoulder, armed with my camera, my midget, and some other small gizmos.

I was more determined, to embark on this adventure, than ever before. I was headed for the ancient city of brown roofs, Ibadan where a one-time Nigeria's most notorious and dreaded bandit that ever lived SHINA RAMBO mounted the pulpit to preach!!! What an irony you would say.

Now Mathew Oluwanifemi, Shina Rambo was a name that sent shivers down the spine of people who lived in the South West of Nigeria and even outside Nigeria, like Benin Republic and neighborhood, in the 1990's. He was a hardened criminal, a terror and killer, one whom men of the security agencies will never forget in a haste!

A man mountain, towering about 6ft 5inch, well built, dark skinned and sweltering eyes, he carried out his operations, like  a movie, in the broad day light, with sophisticated weapons, and bullet belts and explosives strapped roundabout him! He specialized in robbing exotic cars on highways and banks. Nothing could stop him, not even security operatives, he was totally invincible. He was Shina Rambo!

He was born in the year 1958 to a military man who was a bad egg in the service. His father was from Abeokuta in Ogun state, but his mother was a native of Sabongida–Ora in Edo state. His father had over 18 wives, as was the norm for soldiers to impregnate virtually every woman they met where they were posted to.

His father used his military influence to rob innocent citizens, and always brought huge amount of money home. This used to entice little Shina. He recalls, "I remembered when I was about 7 years old, my father came home with a lot of money, foreign currencies, with blood on it, and they were using something like a woman's scarf to wipe it, then I asked him, is this an animal's blood, or human blood?  But he wouldn't answer me, they were just drinking, smoking, and merry making."

Shina was already indoctrinated into the underworld by his father at a tender age of 7 without him knowing it, as he would sit in front of his son, to dismantle and assemble all sorts of weapons and then polishing them in preparation for an operation. This went on for so long till one day, little Shina, entered into his father's room while he had stepped into the toilet, and saw a dismembered gun on the floor. He sat down in front of it, and bit by bit, he had assembled it effortlessly in no time at all. His father came out of the toilet, and saw his son, with a loaded gun in his hands. Shina flashed back and said, "That day my father was so disappointed, that he wanted to kill me, he grabbed the gun from my hand and shot straight at me, but I miraculously escaped out of the room.

Then he waited for me to be less alert at night he came to my room with a machete and tried to behead me, but once again, I escaped, but the machete caught my left leg. (rolled up his trouser to show us the large scar, that made everyone sighed in pity). It cut me so deep I thought I was never going to walk again.  That day I knew I had graduated, all that was left was to pull the trigger, and I was so eager.

Shina Rambo became so notorious in no time, and was hell bent on succeeding in his career as an armed robber, that he went through any length to secure spiritual powers for fortification. To the extent of pounding over 27 live new born babies in the mortar with a pestle, cutting off about 100 human tongues and cooking them to eat, visiting the spiritual river called river of life in Ogoja, Cross Rivers State, living in an Iroko tree for days, and sleeping in the cemetery.

He was given a spiritual wife who always followed him for any operation, she dressed like an Alhaja, people thought she was human, but she was a spirit, that was why they never saw her face.  He said she was his personal driver, that she could drive from Nigeria to Cotonou, in the speed of light. Hear him. "I was involved in so many rituals, that I can't start naming them now, I was so powerful, I went underground, inside trees that looked like a city, a lot of beautiful houses inside the tree, I had my own too, I went into a river called  River of life in Ogoja, where a lot of politicians and wealthy men used to come, I had several personalities, I could change my form whenever I wanted to, that's why the police were busy killing innocent people, and thought they were killing Shina Rambo.

The 9 herbalists that gave me that power, I became stronger than them, one day I went to their shrines, and killed all of them, so that they don't reveal my secrets. I had too many powers; my spiritual wife could drive any car in this world or out of it, no police vehicle, or anyone for that matter, could ever chase and catch me during an operation. She was out of this world, and when she had completed her operation, they took her away from me. I could give anything to get powers, and the elders knew, so they also gave me anything I wanted.

I once beheaded hundred men, and gave them the heads fresh, they were so happy with me that they made me invincible. No matter the kind of bullet you shot at me, it was just like pure water on my body. I could give anything to get power, but of all the things I did to get power, the one that still breaks my heart the most, is sleeping with my mother. My father is dead now, but my mother is still alive, and she lives with me she is 85 years old, whenever I set my eyes on her, I just start crying. I can`t bear it.

Shina Rambo was a raging terror, he was infallibly dangerous, the police dreaded him, both in Nigeria, and Benin Republic, his place of interest for business. He would go to police stations, in broad daylight and kill every policeman there, drive to check points and open fire on every policeman on duty, he didn't like the police at all, and was never afraid of them, he operated in broad day light armed to the teeth looking like Johny Rambo, in the popular Sylvester Stalone movie, "First Blood".

He once robbed 40 exotic cars in one day and drove all of them in a convoy, from Lagos to Cotonou, unstopped. He was powerful; he was wealthy, and impenetrable. He was a tin god, apparently belched from the very arroyo hell, we all dreaded him. He had a wife and three children, but he lost all of them in one day during a bloody police raid whilst he was away on operation. His wife was his stabilizing factor his life changed afterwards. He says "my wife was everything to me, I was forbidden by the elders to sleep with any other woman apart from her, I could gather about 50 women around me in a hotel, and they will just be playing with me, we would smoke, drink, and sniff cocaine, I will give them money but I will never sleep with them. I will go back home to my wife and sleep with her. That was why the police never caught me.

She knew my job, she knew what I was, I never left them alone at night, I operated in the day time and go back home to my family at night. I had everything, I was very wealthy, I once spent 50 million naira in a day.  I did it a lot, there was one day that we were coming from an operation and it seemed as if my powers were going to fail me, the police and the army were almost closing in on us, so we had to drive into a crowd and threw millions of naira in the air, there was commotion, everybody was busy picking naira notes even the police, until we escaped. I was too rich, but anything the devil gives you never lasts, he will collect more from you, it's only the devil that will give you Fila, (cap) and ask for Iro and Buba.(wrapper and top). I lost everything, all the money, my family; I was so powerful the police couldn't catch me but I lost it all.

I had to surrender myself to the police, and I was arrested and jailed for 11 years. When I was serving my jail term in Agodi prisons, Ibadan, Prophet T.O Obadare came visiting, and having been encouraged several times by the Christian brothers and sisters in the prison to give my life to Christ, he prayed for me and converted me, and changed my name to Oluwanifemi, and it was so miraculous, the next day I woke up and started speaking in tongues. It was during the time of President Olusegun Obasanjo, that we were granted freedom.

At this point, I was glued to my seat, the revival where Shina Rambo gave this exclusive confession was on an open ground revival in the ancient city of Ibadan, right in front of me, on stage, was Evangelist Mathew Oluwanifemi, the once feared Shina Rambo, clad in a loose fitting shirt, black pants and a pair of leather sandals with a black Holy Bible in his hands, gigantic dark skinned and bald headed, still had those fiery looks, and stealth movement. 

I was more transfixed than focused, God is indeed awesome, he picked the offering basket  raised it to the congregation  prayed and asked who had anything to give to  God,  at first  I was reluctant, my mind was occupied and out of  an innate compulsion, sheer curiosity I stood up, dipped my hand in my pocket walked towards him briskly and calculatedly  brought out my offering, dropped it into the basket, and looked deep into his eyes, I had too many things to ask him, there were too many questions unanswered. He looked back at me, and spoke in Yoruba, saying God bless you my brother; we know your type when we see them.

The congregation broke into a mild giggle, as all eyes were on me as I went back to my seat, with a lot of things on my mind, and the red light on my midget still blinking, in the breast pocket of my jacket…..

To be continued……

Tunde Moshood.

-Ladun Liadi

Petition Signing #ChildnotBride

published on Saturday, 20 July 2013

We'll Insist That Our Daughters Be Sent To School And Not To Infant Marriages.Education is the bedrock of every society and the education of the girl child is as important as that of her male counterpart. We therefore are surprised that Nigeria's Senate didn't consider making it mandatory for every girl child below 18 to be in school. Instead, they gave a legislative seal of approval for the marriage of underage girls. That means even a 5 year old toddler could be married off by her parents. Nigerians of all tribes and religions have rejected this, and therefore undertake to stand against the state-sanctioned abuse of the girl child.

Today, Saturday, 20th July, 2013, we'll be signing a petition that'll be forwarded to the National Assembly, Abuja.

If you are in Abuja, the venue is: Unity Fountain, by Transcorp Hilton. Also the Park. Time is: 9am-12noon.

For those in Lagos, the venues are:
1. Ojeez Restaurant, National Stadium Surulere.
2. Alausa Park, Opposite Lagos State Governor's Office, Ikeja.
3. The Palms Shopping Mall, Lekki
4. New African Shrine, Agidingbi, Ikeja.
5. Arrangements are still on-going for those in Festac Town and it's environs.Time is 9am-12noon.

We also ask you to volunteer your time to help us take petitions to churches and mosques for signing. We need to gather as many signatures as we can push for within just 2 days. Millions of them, if we can, will speak more than mere thousands. And if the millions are in their tens, the better. We will save the girl child. She's a #ChildNotBride.

We Need to Change this

Paedophilia & Underage Marriage legalised?!: Nigeria has finally lost it!

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Y'all must have seen the following quotes going around;

Dress her up to school, DON'T undress her to bed! #ChildNotBride

#ChildNotBride...Give her a pen not penis...Ask for her books not boobs...Pay her school fees not bride price.

Well, you must have also heard that on the 17th of July the Senate passed a law that a woman to be married doesn't have to be 18years of age before she can be married! Imagine?

It's obvious that the Nigerian Senate has misplaced priorities. There are real issues facing Nigeria as a nation but they choose to occupy themselves with impertinent issues and passing ridiculous bills like antigay marriage laws (with 14years sentence) and a law legalising under age marriage. Do they even sound like serious-minded individuals? It's their likes that went to beat each other up in Rivers State.

A few days ago, on the 17th July, the Senate voted to stipulate that a woman shall not be qualified for marriage until she is 18 years old. The former Governor of Zamfara State, now Senator Ahmad Sani Yarima opposed this ruling claiming it violates Islamic law. The same Senator Yerima in 2009 married a 13 year old girl. He justified his actions by citing that according to Islamic law he was doing nothing wrong. His opposition led the Senate to amend the age specification on the law, leaving it open even to infants. The new law, however now, states that; "A woman is deemed to be "full of age" once she is married irrespective of the age she did so." Imagine? The law indirectly legalises paedophilia! Are they blind or just plain daft? Now, any man can just marry any little girl he deems fit! It doesn't make sense!

A Petition has however been created. Pls sign it and let's remove this useless law. Let's Help The United Nations Stop The Nigerian Senate Repeal This Law!

To SIGN online the ChildNotBride Petition go to #NaPikinNoBeWife

Here's a list of the pro-underage bride senators I got from ;

1. Sen. Abdulmumin M. Hassan (Jigawa South West, PDP)

2. Sen. Abdullahi Danladi (Jigawa North West, PDP)

3. Sen. Adamu Abdullahi (Nasarawa West, PDP)

4. Sen. Ahmed Barata (Adamawa South, PDP)

5. Sen. Akinyelure Ayo (Ondo Central, Labour Party)

6. Sen. Alkali Saidu A. (Gombe North, PDP)

7. Sen. Bagudu Abubakar A. (Kebbi Central, PDP)

8. Sen. Dahiru Umaru (Sokoto South, PDP)

9. Sen. Galaudu Isa (Kebbi North, PDP)

10. Sen. Garba Gamawa (Bauchi North, PDP)

11. Sen. Danjuma Goje Mohammed (Gombe Central, PDP)

12. Sen. Gobir Ibrahim (Sokoto East, PDP)

13. Sen. Gumba Adamu Ibrahim (Bauchi South, PDP)

14. Sen. Hadi Sirika (Katsina North, CPC)

15. Sen. Ibrahim Bukar Abba (Yobe East, ANPP)

16. Sen. Jajere Alkali (Yobe South, ANPP)

17. Sen. Jibrilla Mohammed (Adamawa North, PDP)

18. Sen. Kabiru Gaya (Kano South, ANPP)

19. Sen. Lafiagi Mohammed (Kwara North, PDP)

20. Sen. Lawan Ahmad (Yobe North, ANPP)

21. Sen. Maccido Mohammed (Sokoto North, PDP)

22. Sen. Musa Ibrahim (Niger North, CPC)

23. Sen. Ndume Mohammed Ali (Borno South, PDP)

24. Sen. Sadiq A. Yaradua (Katsina Central, CPC)

25. Sen. Saleh Mohammed (Kaduna Central, CPC)

26. Sen. Tukur Bello (Adamawa Central, PDP)

27. Sen. Ugbesia Odion (Edo Central, PDP)

28. Sen. Umar Abubakar (Taraba Central, PDP)

29. Sen. Usman Abdulaziz (Jigawa North East, PDP)

30. Sen. Ya'au Sahabi (Zamfara North, PDP)

31. Sen. Zannah Ahmed (Borno Central, PDP)

32. Sen. Ahmad Rufai Sani (Zamfara West, ANPP)

33. Sen. Ahmad Abdul Ningi (Bauchi Central, PDP)

34. Sen. Bello Hayatu Gwano (Kano North, PDP)

35. Sen. Ibrahim Abu (Katsina South, CPC)

On The Cover: IK & Toolz on Complete Fashion!

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My best covers in a while! Get a copy now!

Funke Akindele's marriage: celebration to ruins?

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Y'all remember when Funke Akindele and Kehinde Almaroof Oloyede got married in May 2012,right? Well, everybody had their reservations but we all decided to sit back and watch. I love Funke Akindele but I was disappointed she got married to an already married man with kids.

I remember reading a week ago, on facebook, a statement written by Funke Akindele's husband, Kehinde Almaroof Oloyede, stating that their marriage was over and Funke is the "greatest mistake he has made in recent time"! Ouch! Before I knew it, the statement was gone. Apparently, he had deleted his facebook account and created a new one! Coward!

Here's exactly what he said;
"It's with heavy heart that am announcing the separation of me nd ma
wife Mrs olufunke akindele,we've both agreed to go our separate ways coz of irreconcilable differences.we still best of friends nd we 4ever remain gud friends."

Later he added;
"Am doing just fine, gettn along without u,don't need u anymore in ma life.u d greatest mistake av made in recent time."

I later heard they had actually been having issues for a while and Funke had been planning to divorce him quietly, till Kehinde Almaroof Oloyede decided to make it public. Then her publicist released an official statement concerning the issue. Read the statement below;

"Dear Friends,

On behalf of our client, star actress, Funke Akindele, we want to formally inform you that after due consultation and consideration, she's now separated from Mr. Kehinde Oloyede as his wife. She hereby urges her fans and all concerned to pray and wish her the best as she moves on in her career. Kindly note that this is the first and only  official statement from Funke Akindele on the matter and will be glad if her wish is respected.  Thank you.
Sincerely yours,

Ayo Ola- Muhammed,
Principal Consultant
NEECEE  Entertainment."

Following the official statement, I also heard Funke has changed her BBM name from Mrs Funke Akindele Oloyede to Everybody loves Jenifa. She also removed her estranged husband's name, Oloyede, from all her social media accounts.

Then a text, apparently released by funke akindele, made rounds when different newspapers were publishing different versions of the story. Read the text;
"I read in the newspaper yesterday that I am divorced. What proof do you have? And I am taking this to court because my marriage is intact. You guys are rumour mongers. Funke Akindele Oloyede."

Funke Akindele finally spoke to Stella Dimoko Korkus,saying:
"First of all let me clarify that I have not replied any SMS or spoken to anyone on this development before now and neither have I threatened to sue anyone. I do not know who sent out that SMS denying that my marriage is over. That was what necessitated me sending out a press release so as not to confuse the public, especially my fans whom I'm so passionate about.
Yes my marriage has crashed. Let the people who are laughing at me continue laughing.  My job afterall is to make people laugh. Let those who are without sins or mistake cast the first stone. Let them continue judging me. God is the overall judge. He is the one I look up to."

It is well o!

Dame Patience, Our President’s Darling Wife- An Opinion By Reuben Abati In 2010

published on Friday, 19 July 2013

DEMOCRACY is readily associated with freedom: the freedom to be free in many respects and increasingly in Nigeria, many of our compatriots, particularly persons in positions of privilege and authority confuse this with the right to be disagreeable. The sober truth is that democracy is about rights and responsibilities, a democratic dispensation therefore cannot be a licence for disagreeable conduct as a norm; just as the possession of power in any form does not guarantee the right to be reckless or to ignore the etiquette required of office holders. Anyone in the corridors of power, either by chance or right, or appointment, is expected to behave decorously.
Dame Patience Jonathan, as she is now referred to, our President's wife, failed the test this week in Okrika, Rivers State. It is trite knowledge that there is a critical difference between Yenagoa and Abuja, and a world of difference between being the wife of a Deputy Governor/Governor/Vice president and being the wife of Nigeria's No 1 citizen. When people suddenly find themselves in such latter position, prepared or unprepared, anywhere in the world,  they are taken through a crash programme in finishing and poise and made to realize that being the wife of an important man comes with serious responsibilities lest they sabotage the same person that they should be supporting.
If Dame Patience went through such re-orientation, the course was incomplete. This week, we got a feedback drawn from her visit to Rivers state to launch her NGO  – the Women for Change Initiative, when she ended up in Okrika, her home town. This homecoming became an egoistic show-off as she openly contradicted the state Governor, offering him unsolicited lessons on how to develop the Okrika water front and school system, in addition to pointed comments on the use of the English language. The Governor had reportedly insisted that his administration must demolish some houses which adjoin the schools in Okrika in order to create a proper learning environment. Dame Patience disagreed.
She then gave an unsolicited lecture on the land tenure system telling the Governor: "I want you to get me clear. I am from here. I know the problems of my people so I know what I am talking…"   The Governor tried to explain his administration's policy and the larger public interest. The Dame reportedly cut him short: "But what I am telling you is that you always say you must demolish; that word must you use is not good. It is by pleading. You appeal to the owners of the compound because they will not go into exile. Land is a serious issue." Wao! "that word not good." We must all commit that to memory as we re-learn Practical English according to Patience Jonathan!
If it is in the place of the President's wife to teach a state Governor how to run his state, it is definitely not in her place to veto a state policy (the reason the governor used the word "must"), not even her husband has such powers. It seemed as if Dame Patience Jonathan was determined to impress her kith and kin. She told them she had directed the governor not to demolish their houses. Then, she left straight for the airport  obviously having overstayed her welcome and having behaved like a bad guest.  She was scheduled to visit the prisons to grant amnesty to some inmates (is that really her duty or something that should be in her itinerary? ); she was also meant to commission some projects. The face-off between her and the governor put paid to all that.
On the eve of her arrival, a group which calls itself "the Okrika Political Stakeholders Forum" and "the people of Kirikese" had actually placed an advert in the papers welcoming "our amiable daughter and sister…to Rivers state and your home town Okrika." They also brought up the issue of "the land reclamation and shore protection project at Oba Ama, Okrika being undertaken by the Rivers state government." (Daily Sun, August 23, 2010, p. 2).  Either on the strength of this advertorial or private consultations, Dame Patience must have felt compelled to be a partisan stakeholder and intercessor. She needed to put Rotimi Amaechi, the state Governor in his place and that was what did. She recommended "pleading," – that advice is actually meant for her. A state Governor is a duly elected official; and in a Federal system, he is not answerable to the President, and nowhere is the president granted the powers of a Headmaster over state governors. In Okrika, Dame Patience behaved so impatiently and spoke to Governor Amaechi as if he is on the staff of the Presidency. It may not be  her fault though. Amaechi caused it all by bringing himself to such level by undertaking to debrief Dame Patience about his administration's programmes and activities in the misguided hope of getting cheap political endorsement.  He should have asked his wife to attend to her. On the issue of land, Dame Patience should be reminded that the Land Use Act, Section 1 thereof, says the state Governor holds the land in trust for the people. Land matters in the state are beyond the ken of the wife of the President!
The wife of the President of Nigeria, or a state Governor, or a local council chairman, is not a state official. The same applies to husbands if the gender is reversed. He or she is unknown to the constitution or the governance structure.  Recent history has however made it a convention to have the spouses of persons in such positions under the guise of providing support, play some ceremonial roles. This has been routinely abused. Under the Jonathan presidency, Dame Patience Jonathan even got a special allocation in the original budget for the 2010 Golden jubilee anniversary whereas she has no official, financial reporting responsibilities! The international standard is that spouses in these circumstances must not only appear but be seen to be above board like Caesar's wife. They must not misbehave like Marie Antoinette.
When Cherie Blair, wife of former British PM, Tony Blair started buying up houses, apartments and antique furniture, the public raised questions. It didn't matter that she was a professional in her own right, a Queen's Counsel with a traceable source of income. There were also questions about the scope of Hillary Clinton's influence during her husband's Presidency: Americans wanted to be sure that it was the man they elected that was in charge, not his wife. A couple of weeks ago, the American public was up in arms against Michelle Obama and her poll rating dropped drastically after a visit to Spain where she and her daughter reportedly stayed in a $7, 000 a night hotel.
Much earlier, Nancy Reagan was also the butt of public criticism, with people asking: who is she? And this is not a female thing. In Britain, Prince Phillip, the Queen's husband, is constantly criticized for putting his foot in his mouth. He once said for example that "British women can't cook."  He told a visiting Nigerian President, all dressed up in babariga (name withheld): "you look like you're ready for bed." During a state visit to China, he told British students: "if you stay much longer, you'all be slitty-eyed." Prince Phillip's supporters insist that he is honest, but the majority ask: how is the Queen coping with such a man who is perpetually saying something offensive? There may be persons who defend Dame Patience's aggressive style, but some of us ask: how is the President coping?
Since Dr Jonathan assumed office, he and his wife have been practically on the road. The Dame has travelled from one state to the other, under the auspices of the Women for Change Initiative. In every state she tells the women to vote and "make sure your vote counts if you like my husband." Is she now a partisan politician? The Jonathans must be told that Nigeria does not have a co-Presidency. We have only one president and his name is Goodluck Ebele Jonathan. And by the way, what does Dame Patience Jonathan do for a living? She obviously does not have to deal with the challenges of rotation and zoning in her home, unlike the three wives of the Adamawa Governor, Murtala Nyako for whom zoning and rotation have become topical subjects or the wives of South African President Jacob Zuma – that is why she can afford to be so meddlesome!
When she misbehaves as she did in Okrika, she creates the impression that her husband is not in control of his own home. First ladies are prominent figures but their conduct is an eternal subject of public interest. In Nigeria, there was Victoria Gowon, there was also Ajoke Muhammed: dignified and restrained.  There was Maryam Babangida – she was influential but no one could accuse her of verbal recklessness;  Mrs Abdusalami  Abubakar was a court judge, totally self-effacing, No major social party was complete without Mrs Stella Obasanjo, yet she controlled her tongue. Mrs Turai Yar'Adua was described as the power behind the throne and she proved that during the period of her husband's illness but she was carefully reticent. At the state level, there was Remi Tinubu in Lagos state and Onari Duke in Cross River state who have both conducted themselves responsibly in and out of office. The new First Lady likes to travel, party, and talk outside the script. People are beginning to learn to read her lips in order to understand her husband. Dame Patience must not push her Goodluck.

-This piece was written by Dr. Reuben Abati in The Guardian of Thursday, 27th Aug 2010

5 (deceptive) games men play with women

published on Monday, 15 July 2013

If your guy wants to have sex with you tonight, he'd do anything to please you and put you to bed. Don't let your emotions rule you. 

Most men tend to play love games with women at some or the other point in a relationship. If you think it is happening constantly, it's time to talk it out with your boyfriend.

1. Macho impression

Men usually portray a macho impression in front their woman. They always want to prove that they are fearless and that nothing affects them. But not all guys are super manly; they just wish to show they are. If they truly love you, they may ditch the macho impression to do what you like.

2. You'd look better if…

If your guy constantly tell you that you'd look better if you changes your hairstyle, lost some weight or changes the way you dress up, don't take it to mind or get depressed. You know what suits you well. If he criticizes you all the time and wants to change every little thing about you, may be it's time for him to change his relationship status as well.

3. He pretends to love and care

If your guy wants to have sex with you tonight, he'd do anything to please you and put you to bed. Don't let your emotions rule you. Decide whether he's genuinely praising you or caring about you or just pretending to do so. If he is always this way, it is not an issue but he's suddenly caring and loving towards you, there is certainly a motive behind it.

4. Stretching it

If your guy constantly tells you that he loves you but he isn't ready for a relationship that he is surely playing a game. Guys can do anything to get what they want and they'll never take it easy. So if you feel he is not into you, ditch him for a better guy.

5. Breakup and patch up 

A relationship needs to be stable and you cannot always behave the way you wish to as it involves the other person's moods and feelings too. If your guy breaks up one moment and patches up the other, either he is too moody or too indecisive and doesn't know how to handle his emotions. Talk to him about it and let him know that you wish to have some stability in your relationship.


Culled from Ynaija from Times of India

6 reasons to dump your high-maintenance girl

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If she goes to a store and only puts the most expensive things in her shopping bag, you need to watch out. She could easily trade you for the next richest guy on the social circuit. 

Here's are some traits in a girl who you should avoid

1. Hates dining at restaurants which are not upscale: If the posh restaurant is what tickles her appetite she isn't crazy about the food, but the price tag that it comes with.

2. Ridicules people who don't wear branded stuff: If she refuses to hang out with anyone who buys roadside maal, this girl can burn a hole in your wallet…in fact she may set it on fire.

3. Won't buy anything that is not expensive: If she goes to a store and only puts the most expensive things in her shopping bag, you need to watch out. She could easily trade you for the next richest guy on the social circuit.

4. Carries a suitcase for an overnight trip: And if those overnight suitcases are branded then you need to hitch a ride out of that relationship immediately. If she can't do without changing her clothes every two hours then this girl is definitely going to make you pay for the expensive makeovers.

5. Refuses to go camping: If she falls ill every time you make plans to go out camping she definitely isn't going to be by your side if the tide gets rough.

6. Takes 45 minutes to get ready to go to the supermarket: Women do take time when they have to step out, but she can't keep you waiting for 45 minutes for a trip to the supermarket. This high-maintenance girl will not be spotted without her finery at any point of the day.


Culled from Ynaija from Times of India

How to be a great girlfriend in 7 difficult situations

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 When a loved one is sick……Don't try to tell your guy it will be okay, or offer a million ways to make him feel better. Just be there when he wants to talk, cuddle, cry or have company. You don't have to say anything. 

It's easy to know what to do when everything is going fine in you and your man's lives; be sweet, funny, charming, hot—you know, the usual. But when disaster strikes your partner, there are some behaviors you need to ease up on, and some that will be all new territory for you. Here's how to be a quintessential and supportive girlfriend in some of life's most trying situations.

Maybe it's an ex who left him at the alter or cheated on him, or perhaps an ex who went a little crazy and warranted a restraining order. Either way, you can't just go on as if nothing just happened when you and your man run into his ex.

If it was an ex who broke his heart, you might wonder if he still has feelings for her. But look: he is with you now. The last thing he needs after running into an ex is to have to console you and let you know everything is okay. In this case, act casual, happy and just ask, "Was that weird for you?" "Weird" is a neutral word. It doesn't imply sad, scary, upsetting or anything in particular. It opens it up to your man to say whatever is on his mind, and it displays no judgment on your part. If it's a crazy ex, she will in all likelihood do something crazy when she sees him with you, like yell at you, throw a drink at you, shove you or a number of things. You have to act completely un-phased by it, because your man will be so embarrassed that he ever dated someone like that, and feel terrible you had to feel her wrath. Laugh it off. Tell him you're so sorry for him. Change the subject as soon as possible. If possible, ask him to go do his favorite activity.

Sometimes parents just suck, right? Sometimes, instead of being the unconditionally loving, supportive and comforting people they should be, they are harsh, unsupportive, critical, judgmental and hurtful. And it is very uncomfortable for your partner to have you see his parents be this way towards him.

If your man's parent was just a total heart-less jerk to him, saying or doing something very un-maternal/paternal, he's no idiot, and you can't put a nice spin on why they did it. So show your man you see what he sees: tell him that yes, his parent is being awful right now! And it must be very painful for him. But, at the same time, nobody wants to see their parent as a monster, and you—as a non family member—are not really in a place to trash talk. So, while you sympathize and acknowledge how tough the parent is being, also analyze. Tell your partner there must be a reason his parent is being that way—some fear they have, or stress they are under. At the end of the day, whether we like it or not, we cannot dismiss our parents entirely. Part of surviving with them, is rationalizing some of the awful things they do. Help your partner do that.

When a man gets fired, he doesn't feel like a man. He doesn't feel that he has the skills to provide not only for himself but for a family one day. In addition, men have an incredible sense of competition, and in this economy, it's even higher. Each man feels like he won't be the one to get the boot. And when it happens, it's even more devastating because he knows, in this economy, how much harder it will be to get back up.

There is nothing sophisticated, complicated or even that psychological about this solution: your man needs to still feel competent and attractive in some arena of his life! He doesn't want your pity, and to be honest, he doesn't even want your help finding a new job. All he needs from the woman in his life is to still be a man in her eyes. Get ready to be active in the bedroom; your man needs your attention. As for talking about the issue, only do it when he wants to. If he isn't bringing it up, it's because he wants it off his mind right now.

When his screenplay gets rejected for the tenth time, or he once again doesn't land that acting job, or is denied a loan to start his business or in some way, his baby (his dream) that he has been nursing for years still isn't finding its place in the world, what do you do? What do you tell a man up against all odds?

Remind him that any role model he has in his field was exactly where he is now at one point. Remind him that while he persists and persists, his competitors lose hope and drop out of the race. Remind him that no step or effort is wasted because connections or lessons are gained from each. Remind him that he has nothing to lose, and that the worst that can happen by continuing on is more rejection, and he already knows how to handle that, right? Remind him that life is too short to not go after your dreams, and while chances are slim of them coming true now, they go down to zero if he gives up.

This is a tough situation because, unless you are a doctor, there is very little you can do to remedy the actual problem at hand. And if you think you feel helpless, your man feels even more helpless seeing his mother/brother/best friend in a dangerous medical situation.

Often, when someone is hurting emotionally, and somebody comes in trying to "fix" things, the person in pain feels a responsibility to at least make it seem like the fixer actually, well, fixed things. But, you're not really fixing anything; you're just giving your guy an added responsibility of having to now make you feel good about your efforts. Don't try to tell your guy it will be okay, or offer a million ways to make him feel better. Just be there when he wants to talk, cuddle, cry or have company. You don't have to say anything. And then help in the ways you can, like with chores, or errands, or helping out the rest of his family that is affected by the situation. He'll appreciate that you are realistic about the problem at hand.

Even the least paternal man feels a sense of fatherly love towards his dog. He may not have even realized what a big responsibility it had been in his life at the time—waking up early to feed the dog, putting aside money for vet visits, organizing for pet sitters—but when a man's dog gets ill and eventually passes, he may realize for the first time that he was the protector of this living thing and he may feel that he failed.

Nobody ever loves your dog as much as you do. For that reason, people often write off the pain you are in when your pet passes away. They'll give you a quick, "Aw, I'm sorry" maybe accompanied by a hug, but then they'll ask you what you want on your sandwich. Life goes on for everyone else, and you have to pretend you're not in immense pain because it was just an animal, right? Wrong! Your guy can either feel incredibly emotionally distant from you in this time if you're not going through the pain with him, or he can feel you're the only person that gets him. Treat this like the death of a human. That's how it feels to your guy. For weeks, possibly even months, treat your man as if he just went through a big loss. Things will be about him for a bit—about making him feel better.

Hopefully your man isn't struck with anything untreatable, but he still might go through periods of being very ill for a long time. Fighting pneumonia, recovering from a surgery, or fighting an infection. There are plenty of things that could have your boyfriend out of shape, out of work, and out of his regular life for weeks or even months.

The biggest mistake partners make when the other is sick is forgetting, that person can't do the stuff you used to do! They probably cannot have sex as often (or perhaps at all while sick), they don't have the energy to go out for dinner, having friends over exhausts them. Don't ask them to do those things unless they suggest them themselves. Otherwise, your partner will end up worrying about letting you down and dragging you into their sickness with them. And that literally adds insult to injury. Do what you need to do for yourself—see your friends, go to your workout class, buy a good vibrator—so that you're energized to take care of your partner. Taking care of yourself is one of the most crucial parts to taking care of someone else. If you don't do it, you'll be exhausted, irritated and a poor caretaker.

Culled from Ynaija from Madame Noire

5 traits of a great girlfriend

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1. Intelligence
Let's face it--being with a woman that's beautiful but dumb gets old pretty fast.

2. Independence
Dealing with a woman that can't seem to function without you will eventually make you feel like you're suffocating in the relationship.

3. Loyalty
A great girlfriend loves her man…flaws and all, and takes the time to show him how much she appreciates him every day. This type of woman is ready to go to war with you and take on whatever obstacle life presents.

4. Beauty
Whether or not she's up for first prize in a beauty contest, a great girlfriend is beautiful on the inside and the outside.

5. She makes you want to be a better man
A great girlfriend inspires you to improve yourself without even saying anything. Just being around her makes you want to better yourself


Is he interested in the news? SEE 10 dating red flags that should send you running

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 If a man can't talk about current events and has no idea what is going on in the world, he isn't the man for me.

Going out on a date with anyone is a leap of faith. We trust that they aren't an ax murderer or a weirdo or someone bent on worldwide destruction. Most of the time, dates go bad for any number of reasons, both big and small — he picks his teeth or talks about himself too much. You find there is no chemistry or he is simply not that interesting to you.

Sometimes, however, it's harder to tell. Sometimes a guy seems perfectly nice and there is some chemistry, but you still can't really tell.

For those situations, there are some obvious ways to help yourself know if he deserves a second date. Here are 10 dating red flags that should either send you running or make you proceed with extreme caution. Here they are:

1. He tips badly: Bad tippers are often selfish people. He doesn't have to be the king of all tippers, but less than 15 percent tells me he will be cheap and ungenerous in other ways, too.

2. He calls his mom and dad "mommy" and "daddy": My husband totally does this and maybe it's a Southern thing, but this is super weird to me.

3. He is disrespectful about ex-girlfriends/ex-wives: Every person has an ex who hurt them in some way and every person has baggage left from old relationships. But smart people learn from those relationships and find ways to respect what they learned. Someone who didn't wouldn't be great to date.

4. He is rude to waiters: Anyone who is rude to wait staff or people in retail stores will eventually be rude to you as well. Watch this one.

5. He doesn't read books: This could be just me. But when I dated a man, I wanted to know what books he read, and if he hadn't read any recently, that said something to me. Even if they were books I wouldn't have read (my husband reads science textbooks), I wanted a man who read SOMETHING for pleasure. I was looking for a well-read man who was intellectually curious. To me, this said he wasn't.

6. He smokes: In this day and age, smoking is just gross. No matter how cool he is, a guy who doesn't take care of his health isn't a guy I would want to be with.

7. He doesn't work out: This is really not a red flag for everyone, but for me, it's very important that a guy appreciates taking care of his body and working out as much as I do. My family is very outdoorsy and active and I always knew I wanted it to be that way.

8. He disparages women: A friend went on a date with a guy who laughed about some other woman's "fat ass." My skinny friend didn't take it personally, but she did realize that this wasn't a man who respected women.

9. He is not interested in the news: If a man can't talk about current events and has no idea what is going on in the world, he isn't the man for me.

10. He hasn't traveled or has no desire: To me, travel is one of the key markers of intellectual curiosity. A man who hasn't traveled or who doesn't desire to do so isn't a man I could see building a life with since it's something I couldn't live without.


Culled from Ynaija from The Stir